G for Guapo

I just had to tell this little story about G. I've mentioned before the facination that many people have over my children. G gets most of the attention. I think it's cute, complementry, intrusive and a little disturbing all at the same time. I mean, it is always nice to hear complements about your children - but here they are almost revered - and that bothers me. I don't want my sons to grow up thinking that blue eyes and fair skin is 'better' than any other color eyes or skin. It is certainly not what we teach them, and no one has so much as told them so, but there is this facination and attraction in them that they, and we can't help but recognize. All the kids around ask about them - especially the girls. In fact, I make a point to remind them that the color of someone's eyes is not what makes them beautiful - it is what is behind their eyes in their spirit that makes them beautiful or ugly. Still, the boys garner a great deal of attention.


To add to that, G is a curious child. He LOVES to be 'one of the guys'. If any man is working on anything, he HAS to be right in there learning, helping, being part of the action. C on the other hand would much rather be off in his own world imagining other worlds and stories in his mind. This curious and helpful nature of G's grants him even more attention. The men (and ladies for that matter) seem to love him. G is usually right in the middle of the action (unless it's especially dangerous) and sooner or later, he's picked up a tool or shovel and is pitching in.


Today's story is a perfect example of this. There are paving crews paving the road in front of our house. G was outside first thing watching them. I knew he was interested so I instructed him that he could watch from the grass and had to stay out of the way.

Time passes, and I decide to check on him. Now he's standing right beside the workers as the paver slowly moves along the fresh asphalt. The men don't seem to be bothered by him - in fact, they seem to enjoy his company. Still, I remind him to stay on the grass and he'll have to watch from a safe distance.


Time passes again, and I go out to look for him. The crews have moved down the road a bit, so I expect he is on the grass near where they are working. Hmmm..... I can't see him. I walk towards where they are working. I pass the boss on his motorcycle who motions that my son is there, but I don't see him still. Do you?
Then the nice guy in the red shirt points him out to me. True to his nature, there he is - right in the middle of the action.
The little rascal has worked his way into their hearts and onto their equipment. I check with the boss - no problem -they just want to be sure he stays off the road for his safety. G is grinning like a cheshire cat. G tells me that they offered that he could ride the machine when they are ready. I am unsure about this, so I stick around to watch what is happenning. When they need to move (whatever it's called - lets call it Rolly from Bob the builder), they tell him he has to get down - they don't want him to fall off. G complies without complaint and watches from the sidelines. G also informs me that he was 'helping' to shovel the asphalt. Hmmmm.
I made him come back to watch from in front of the house so I can keep an eye on him. As I am watching from the balcony window, one of the gravel truck drivers stop in front of our house to talk with G. I watch/listen to make sure everything is ok. Yep, they just wanted to chat with the cute little guapo (handsome) boy. In fact, I overhear G invite the driver to go out to the beach to go swimming - to which the driver responds, "Sorry, I have to work. See you later!" Sure enough, a while later I see him in the middle again- so he gets sequestered inside the house. That's the end of that adventure - or at least until they are back to pave the other side of the road.


So -in addition to the cute story about my impetuous son, it always amazes me just how kind and friendly the people are here. He was never in any danger - they made sure of that and I knew he would be safe- but there is no way he would have had this opportunity with unknown workers in Canada or US. He would simply be 'in the way'. Not only was he not in the way, but they were enjoying the experience almost as much as he was.


Machetis are another facinating tool for G. They are everywhere here, and people leave them lying around. We have threatened him with all kinds of punishments to keep him from wielding one. So far, the temptation has turned out to be too great for him- the punishment is worth the price apparently. Even explaining that the Machetis can cut off a limb does not seem to phase him. Habanero Sauce is the next level.......


Mexico is almost taylor made for G. There is so much to do around here. He gets the opportunity to see all kinds of trades and work and loves every minute of it.

I said, "No more Pets!"

While G was an infant, I was overwhelmed. C was still in diapers, we had a dog, 2 cats and 2 gerbils. I was up to my neck in 'poop'. I decided then, NO MORE PETS. I didn't have the heart to get rid of any of our long term family members, but I intended not to replace them when they did pass away.

This changed with the passing of our dog, Zeus. This impacted C more deeply than I had expected. Bill lobbied hard for a new dog, and I put it off saying when we were in Mexico AND we had a fenced yard, AND he totally took care of it, we could get a dog. View the story here.

I was ok with the dog as C and Bill were taking care of him. Then last week we were walking home from the center of town with the dog. We passed the little creek close to our home, and heard a little 'mew'. Tius launched at the place where the sound came from. I pulled Tius off and the boys picked up a tiny white kitten. We looked around. No mother cat, other kittens or homes nearby that this little kitten could have come from. I mean this little one is about 3 weeks old.

So here's the big truth in it all. As much as I try to be tough, I could not leave this tiny thing left to whatever other dog, snake or starvation. So we took it home. It was so young, we had to feed it milk with a syringe. I am still trying to figure out how to find another home for it.

I find out that unfortunately, it is common for some people here to discard unwanted baby animals on the side of the road to become food for stray dogs, or whatever. That also did not help my efforts in finding someone to adopt this little critter. We decided to allow G to have this kitten and take responsibility for it. He had wanted a puppy for himself and was very disappointed when we told him he had not yet learned to be gentle enough to our family cats to earn the right to own his own pet. He since learned his lesson and strives to be more patient and helpful. This kitten would be far less work than a puppy and it would show a confidence boost in his ability to care for an animal (supervised of course).

That's not the end of my story. The next day, C and G go next door to visit their neighbor friend. On the way home, C finds another kitten, easily a block away from where we found the first one, and a week older than the first one, or so it seemed. This kitten was larger, more developed (it could eat out of a dish). Ugh. Same scenario, I couldn't just leave him alone out there to be lunch.

So now we have 2 new kittens. So much for my big decisions. The other unfortunate part is that our older cat, Tigger is plain not happy about any of it. Let's see. We dragged the poor thing on an airplane to a new home -he really hated that. Before he had even adjusted to the new home, we brought home an older puppy. I thought he'd be ok with it as we used to have a dog. Wrong. Tigger really hated that too. He lost his life-long buddy Panther. Now, he is thoroughly not impressed by the two little kittens that are now starting to play with everything. Poor Tigger. Mexico has not been good to him.

We have since determined that the likelihood that these are from two different litters is not very good, so we think the first kitten (Snowball/Snow bell) is the runt. We have named the second kitten Screech due to his very loud protests at being carried.

So now I have more on my to do list - as any mother knows it takes more work to TEACH responsibility than to actually do it yourself. Thankfully, both kittens can now each out of a bowl - but need to be fed 4 times a day. G is very happy with his new responsibility and doing very well - though we often have to remind him that it is not a stuffed toy.

I think one of my volunteer projects will be establishing an SPCA here - or at the very least - finding a way to get all these animals spayed/neutered - before I have a house full of cats.

Dia de Los Muertos (Day of the Dead)

While most of you were celebrating Halloween, I was silent to my boys about it. You see, Halloween is not really celebrated here. They do celebrate Dia de los Muertos. Now, this was the confusing part - I was getting different descriptions from different people about what to expect on this holiday. Then I did some research on-line. What I basically gathered was that the kids still go out in costume on Nov 1 -not Oct 31 and sing a song to get sweets. So I decided not to bring up Halloween and that we would celebrate on the 1st.

Dia de los Muertos is celebrated as kind of a mix between ancient Aztec culture and catholic beliefs with a little American Halloween thrown in. I think the mixture is the reason why I was getting mixed messages. Basically this day is specifically for remembering loved ones who have passed on. They build small alters in their house covered in greenery and flowers (mostly orange ones) then they burn a special incense that you buy at the market in chunks of what looks like rock wrapped in newspaper.

On the alter they place favorite treats or food that the deceased loved ones liked. No one else is supposed to touch the food as it is believed that the spirits visit the homes of their living families and 'absorb' the smells and tastes of the treats or food on the alter. They believe that after Dia de los Muertos, the food has no flavor because the spirits took it away. ( Or MAYBE its just gross from sitting out for a day or two????)

In addition to the alters in their homes, they spend days cleaning, grooming and decorating the cemetary. By Nov 2 the cemetary is bright and colorful with flower arrangements. They pray for and remember those who passed on.

There was quite a bit of bustle around town-and a lot of flowers. That evening Bill was with clients so the boys and I went for a walk in town to see what was happening. There were a hand-full of boys walking around with masks on chanting, "Queremos Halloween!"(we want Halloween) I told my boys that these boys weren't supposed to be out and were early -but inside I panicked. Now my sons know it's Halloween and what if there is no Halloween like some have said?

Nov.1 we go out first thing (well for Mexico it's about 10:00) and head into the local small city of Cardel to get Halloween stuff. To further create confusion for me, There is very little in the way of Halloween stuff. There is a lot of decorative type stuff- but very few costumes and no face paint. Yikes! I had seen a few costumes at Walmart in Jalapa(which I was not going to drive there), and I knew there was one place in town that had expensive costumes - which I could not afford.

We bought a couple of wall decorations and went to a couple of bigger stores here hoping to find face paint as the boys just wanted to be 'scary' this Halloween. Hmmm, could not find what we wanted. We went to a local kid's store (like a Please Mom with toys) where I knew they had superhero and princess costumes hoping they would be on sale being the last day. Alas, no. I do have a girlfriend who owns the store with her mom, so I asked her about what to expect. Again I got a slightly different answer. Now I am starting to freak out a little. I bought quite a bit of candy ( and no they didn't have much Halloween candy like in Canada -just regular stuff you find in packages in the candy isle) thinking that we might have to make our own Halloween.

Bill called and mentioned that he had seen masks in the market so we wandered that way. There we saw so many flowers it was amazing. The markets were full of people - more activity than usual. There were also stands selling bread - which I figured was 'sweet bread' which is a special bread they eat to celebrate this special day.

There were also little stands selling all kinds of sweets. Decorated skulls made from sugar ( ugh my teeth hurt just looking at them) lined the stand along with many other little treats. I bought my boys each a skull, and the nice guy at the stand gave them another tiny one as a gift (regalo) very nice - but yikes! More sugar.

One of the things I was told is that the kids go out during the afternoon, before dark. so at about that time we went for a walk to talk to our friend Juan who owned one of the local stores (tiendas). He spoke pretty decent English and would know what is traditional in our little town (puebla). He told me that the kids go out at night and that the 1st was for the little kids and the 2nd was for the older ones. Ok - finally we had a solid answer. Now all I have to do is make the kids wait until sundown.

After the sun set we ventured out. Thinking that it was somewhat like trick or treating, we approached a couple of houses that had exterior lights on. No one answered. Then we went to another place. The very nice lady answered in her house coat. Hmmmm. She motioned for us to enter her house (a no-no in Canada but nearly a requirement here -it would be rude to stand outside). She loves the boys' masks and proceeds to check her fridge. I tried to tell her not much, but she filled their bags with probably a good percentage of the fruit she had in her fridge, half a loaf of sweet bread as well as cookies and sweets that she handed to me for me! Ok, so now I'm worried again. Was I supposed to do or bring something? I didn't bring a bag for my goodies - I didn't know I needed to! The boys are a little puzzled by the fruit, but thankfully we've taught them to be appreciative of whatever they are given because it may be all they have to give.

I left that house with mixed emotions. Incredibly impressed by the generosity of this lady and most of the other people we have met here in Mexico, who other than knowing OF us, did not actually know us, and gave us a good percentage of her groceries. I also left feeling completely guilty not knowing what her situation was, and that she gave us A LOT, and that we would likely not appreciate it nearly as much as we should (the bread and cookies are not like we are used to we don't care for them), and that because of their generous nature, she would likely go without so my boys could have Halloween.

Now we progress with my children completely excited about Halloween, and me dreading what else lay ahead and how selfish I will feel by the end of the night.

The next home we approach contained people that we knew enough to recognize as the owners of the local tortilla store in town. They were excited to see us and tried to teach my boys how to sing the whole song - we just settled on the Quiermos Halloween part. They gave the boys a little money, more fruit and cookies as well as more cookies for me (plus a bag to put my growing treat supply in). It was still alot, but at least this family seemed ready for us and it felt like something normal.

We decided to go to the tiendas (stores) in town next. At least there I knew I had at least purchased groceries there so I could feel less guilty about my sons getting treats. Sure enough, they had some treats from the store they gave away.

We went to a few more houses - all with mixed results - some people ignored us (I was beginning to wonder if we were only supposed to visit friends' houses?), some people welcomed us and gave us more of their fruit and some had actual candy.

We stopped at the house where we pay our rent (as I needed to do so) and they graciously offered a chair to sit on while they wrote up the receipt. They also had treats for the boys. At the house, some of the extended family were there for the holidays. They have sons a little older than my boys, some of which speak English and offered to take my boys with them to get more treats, I decided to let them go - I wanted them to find more friends to play with.

While I waited for the boys to return, they offered to give me yet more food - tamales. When the boys returned, we thanked them and went on our way.

On the way home a group of older girls asked if they could take a picture with my sons. After each of them had their turn, I took a picture of all the girls with my boys, so you can see their fan club. The girls weren't dressed up as the older kids go out the next night.

We came home that night with so many fruits and cookies it was hard to imagine. Yes, they also got candies, but not that many (just fine with me). I still marveled at the generosity of these people. Most of the ones who gave us so much we had never spoken to before. I wondered what I could do to somehow repay these people-as even that can be complicated. I determined to find some way.

I am grateful for that experience, and for my sons' humility. They never complained one little bit about the cookies that they didn't like or all the fruit. Actually, they like fruit - so no problem. I was also grateful to learn more about the generous nature of these humble people.